My husband and I always have mixed feelings about celebrating Valentines day. We hate the commercialism of the whole thing and the pressure that cards and flowers should be given, and any potential disappointment, if say a modest bunch of flowers were bought, instead of the most expensive ones on display.
Each year, men gather around the red honey pot inspecting the flowers on display, mulling over their choice. As a florist I have spent a good few hours preparing for such a purchase. The Valentine’s industry certainly is a profitable one and there is nothing wrong with that.
I know the idea of Valentines was to give surprise and secret cards to a loved one, un-requited or not. The thrill of trying to find out who sent and how many. I can remember though, as a teenager the angst of never receiving Valentines cards, so there can be a lot of pressure and feelings of not being good enough as a person, when the red and pink envelopes don’t drop on the mat.
While there are many forms of love in many different relationships which are all healthy, genuine and not harmful, Valentines can become a more grim affair- yes, apt word, when one partner is cheating on another and giving secret gifts and cards to a mistress or lover. That is the sad but a real side to another Valentines form of expression which can only lead to broken flowers and hearts.
All I am saying is that while we have bought cards (I am presently pondering if I should go and buy, and has he got me one for tomorrow-actually I think he has thought), the general feeling is, that it is want counts the other 364 days of the year. Flowers, cards and chocolates are nice on the day but the romance soon flies out of the window, if there is upset, tears and arguments tomorrow. We, like many thousands of couples, are testimony to that.
It would be easy to go out and buy whisky truffles, my husbands favourite or a new tie but perhaps clearing his re-cycle area full of stuff waiting to be shipped out would mean more. (He has just told me a gate for the area would be really rather nice, though he will have to wait for that until finances becomes available).
Whatever you are doing on Valentines day tomorrow, enjoy yourself. For me sadly, Valentines is being spent away from him. He is working as usual, requested time off for a party and it’s a no go: request was in too late. That for me would have meant more than any card. However, I am still going and making the best of the weekend.After all Valentines day should be 365 days of the year and there is always an opportunity to show care, have fun and create a special day any time of the year.
While writing this blog, my husband has been in and out of this office chattering away at me all the time. I suppose that shows he is glad to see me and my company- having just finished a 52.5 hr week – I only work part-time, (though it doesn’t feel like it). So while it has interrupted me, I can see the nice part of it too and not be irritated by it.
Happy Valentines Day for tomorrow and have a great time everybody.