Posted in Commitment, Debate, families, Modern society, Relationships, Thoughts

Men and the Christmas Card

This is a short blog following a conversation with a close relative who owns and runs a card shop. It concerns the psychology of men’s thinking -in his shop, when it comes to purchasing the annual christmas card for the lady in their life.

The family member will be refered to as A. I will be known as OTW.

A: ” Well, I shall be putting out the wife and girlfriend cards this week in a prominent display. I have 800 waiting to be sold, and they will all go this week.”

OTW: ” Gosh, haven’t they gone already? That is a lot of cards.”

A: “Men always leave it to the last minute. Every year it is the same. They think to themselves, better get the Misses a card otherwise there will be hell to pay.”

OTW: “Is it because men don’t care about their women?”

A: “No, not at all, we just think differently that’s all. Now with the lady’s it is completely the opposite. I am nearly out of those because they will buy in October and November. They will come into the shop and take time to choose at leisure. They look at the words, the picture. They will ruminate and ponder. The men, they are in and out like a flash: What have you got for the Misses mate?” “That will do nicely”, and out he goes.

OTW: So what kind of card does he go for then?”

A: The biggest!

OTW: “The biggest?”

A:” Yeap, I have a system knowing what will sell first. I put the biggest on the top part of the shelving. The man comes in, grabs the biggest first. That will do lovely mate, he says. He takes no time and hardly looks at it. It is a card so he is covered. He won’t get-it-in-the-neck this Christmas. That is sorted he tells me. Next will sell is the second biggest. I put the next size at the top and away they go, until only the 0.99p are left.”

OTW:” Isn’t that incredible. I would have never thought that. That just goes to show you that when it comes to how we women view things and the psychology of spending:men are different to women.

A: Completely.

OTW: “So what happens when you run out?

A: ” There will always be individuals who are too late to buy. I close this Saturday afternoon. Pretty much everyone who wanted to have bought will have visited us by then.However, there will be a guys who speed up in their work van who then says:

Sod It, I shall have to try somewhere else fast.” 

OTW: “Let’s hope he gets one then, otherwise he is in the …… and he won’t be getting anything under the mistletoe or his dinner.”

I laugh.

End of conversation.

I read today with interest another blogger-a bloke of course no less, who is about to contemplate his Christmas shopping only a few days before Christmas. I would like to get behind those thinking membranes to find out why men are so late with Christmas, or as in my nearest and dearest; leave me to do all the thinking, buying, writing and wrapping.

What do men really think of Christmas?Is it that they like to display their affection in other ways (SEX maybe likely-hey I’m game), if they could, rather than send a card that will end up in the bin, the recycle bucket in Tesco, or keepsake draw afterwards ?  Are they really too lazy to care, too busy?Or are we ladies just too organised, so we get lumbered with all the hassle?

I finished my shopping today. My husband will no doubt have put thought into my gift, after I told him what I wanted. He purchased it within 20 mins today.Interestingly, he said he was having second thoughts about my card and considered getting another. I told him I’m sure the one he has is just fine.

Have fun everyone as you are doing the shopping.

And remember you lads, it’s the thought that counts not the size.

The Language of Love indeed!



Committed to the education of children and the health and human rights of women and mankind. I also enjoy taking photographs and sometimes I write poetry.

4 thoughts on “Men and the Christmas Card

  1. Being a man, I don’t understand your problem. If the card and presents get bought by Christmas day, what really is the problem? If they aren’t bought I will let you have a problem, but as they are, I am struggling to see what it is.

    Here are some provocative thoughts:
    1) Men are functional animals. If the job gets done in time, don’t worry about it unless you have to or until you have to. There are bigger things to worry about.
    2) Women often like to think men are incapable, and men are quite happy for them to think that as it means that women think they have to do everything.
    3) Some men are resistant to pressure. If everyone spends weeks going on about how this needs to be done, most men will resist doing anything until they absolutely have to. As my daughter starts nagging me about Christmas shopping in September, I deliberately now leave it until as late as possible to assert my independence. (She goes about telling everyone how hopeless I am and how she has to rescue me each year, and I am quite happy for her to think that.)
    4) Traditionally some men relate to the world more easily in doing things and women relate more easily by relating. Hence, the different ways of buying cards. However, not all men are like that. Some will think carefully about the wording in the card. Others would refuse to by a card and think of other, more practical ways, of trying to create delight and show affection.
    5) Some women create a myth that if they didn’t do everything, nothing would happen. They could try asking for help and training their ‘incompetent partners’, or they could just do a normal amount and see what happens. It would be different, but it wouldn’t necessarily be disastrous. As long as they MUSTerbate – I must do this because if I don’t the world to end – they will drive themselves into the ground.

  2. Some very interesting thoughts . I wasn’t generally criticising men here, just to observe the different thinking and shopping habits. I agree completely with point 4. Also, note, I said the traits of this one particular shop. I would not wish to generalise the shopping habits of men.
    Yes, I could sit back and wait and see what happened and I know it would be chaos and I would get the blame for leaving things, need to be more organised etc.
    I agree sometimes, women do not like to not be in control and I also agree we can make our men more looking like incompetent by our own actions. Men allow this to happen as well though, much to our frustation sometimes.
    Perhaps, I will change tact next xmas.I have hinted as such but I am not very positive or optimistic anything will change.
    This was meant as a light hearted blog, so don’t take it so seriously thinkingman.
    I thought you would enjoy it, bearing in mind your profession. Obviously you didn’t.

  3. OK,then, that’s cool. I am still getting used to your replying style. Normally, it is just me that does the replying to your work, not my own.

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